MY plans - NOT

Well.....so much for holding out the fort here!! The bug slowly made its way through all of us in cruel fashion this week! Poor Abby definitely had it the worst, though! Tuesday night, a full three days since she got sick (you know - just long enough to worry yourself sick and then convince yourself that it has been long enough and you have all escaped) I came down with it! Mine came with fever and the works which put me in the bed Wednesday and part of Thursday. I made it up Thursday to go to work a while, only to get a call from Stewart that he was going home early - he didn't feel right ~yikes~. So I get home to find him in the bed. He was a big boy about it and said go on with our normal Thursday gymnastics, etc. So I took off with both girls (still feeling completely weak kneed and nauseous, but determined to get on with something called "normal") We got back home, I gave the girls a bath and boom - here went Ellie Kate!! Poor Abby, she just cried convinced that she had "given" her germs to poor EK!! I got Abby in the bed and spent the next few hours dealing with one strong 15 month old! She was determined to play her way through it :) Poor baby, it finally got the best of her, and it hurt her feelings SO bad!

It was a long night, but Friday awoke to Abby skipping off to school, Stew feeling better, and EK making a fairly quick and strong recovery considering. It's now a beautiful Sunday, and as I sit looking back, it kind of feels like I am looking over the remnants of a battlefield. We won, we're still alive, but WHEW the aftermath!!! Gotta love contagious bugs!!! I've always laughed that when I get to Heaven (hoping of course that I DO!), I wanted to ask God a few (trivial)questions - #1 - Why can't everyone just be a healthy size 8 and call it a day? #2 - Why in the WORLD did you allow things like stomach viruses to exist!!! YUKKO!!

One note of spiritual interest - of course I've admitted before that I have some strange panic when it comes to stomach viruses and their spread through the family. We've survived another. Hopefully I can put this in my arsenal of tools to stand on. Sounds simplistic, but I guess the Devil will get you on any side He can. Poor Abby - Friday morning, when I woke her up for school, she asked me if EK was ok and had she thrown up anymore after she went to bed. I told her she was better, but yes she had been sick in the night. She just started squalling! When I got her to stop and tell me, she said she had prayed and begged God not to let her sissy be sick anymore and was SO sorry for giving it to her. :( :( I didn't know what to tell her! I just hugged on her, told her I was so proud of her for praying, EK was so much better, etc. and started getting her ready for school. What do you say when God doesn't answer prayers like you prayed? I don't know what to really tell myself, much less a 5 year old! Our ways our not His just don't add up in their little minds! What is even harder is knowing that this won't be her only battle with this question. I know I still have to actively control my thoughts and meditations to not wonder about unanswered prayers. "Farther along we'll know all about it........"

Anyway, I sit in a mountain of mail, bills to be paid, outgrown clothes that need to be stored, odds and ends of this coming season's clothes that need matches, accessories, etc. At least the laundry is done!!

No pictures - trust me - none needed or wanted this week!

We've got SUNshine - we're about to get out in it!!! The SONshine is there too.........trying to cultivate it and get it to wash it all away :)

Hoping for a great week for all!!

Two More Things...

We did have some version of a Valentine's Day - everyone got presents, some not on the 14th. Stewart and I hope to make up for it soon, maybe :) Look for random pictures soon!

Also, I couldn't let the last post go without this......sometime over the last 48 hours of no sleep and LOTS of "cleanup", ABby sweetly looked up and said, "You're the best mommy ever!"

What else do we need???

Living to Press Fast-Forward

Seriously - what next?? I just read my last post about catching up. That has SO not happened!! Since then, I was sick and in THE BED for four days! That just isn't normal for me! It started as a monster kidney/UT infection complicated by a terrible reaction to antibiotics and ending with a trip to the ER with unexplained, extreme pain. That diagnosis is still up in the air. Lordy, you know when you have to ship the kids off to Mimi's just to survive, it's NOT a good weekend!!

Friday night we went to a singing to see New Harmony. It was nice to go to a singing and not sing (although we did end up singing - I guess that will always happen!) We got to see Kensley - Abby was SO excited to sit and talk with her. A slumber party is planned for VERY soon! Ellie Kate was also surprisingly good. She is typically a MONSTER at church - seriously, no exaggeration! With our singing schedule spinning back up again I was more than a little apprehensive of what she would be like. Well, evidently there is much more to keep her attention at a singing than at church because she was VERY good!

Saturday started out beautiful! The weather was perfect, it was just me and the girls, we were enjoying some "normal". We even went to Gigi's cupcakes together - just me and the girls! (I would have pictures, but 2 girls, 1 Mom and 4 cupcakes did not leave time or hands for a camera!!) Then came that night. We went out to eat with some friends, and Abby just wasn't right. Then I saw THE look - I jumped, grabbed her, ran for the bathroom, but TOO LATE! Here comes a stomach bug - eeeewwwww. That poor baby was SO sick that night. I ended up just laying in her bedroom floor because it was wearing me out jumping and running every 45 minutes. Sunday wasn't much better. At one point, the on-call weekend nurse even suggested we take her to the ER. We were able to safely wait it out. She is better tonight and might go back to school tomorrow. So far, none of the rest of us have caught it. I'm still hoping and praying on that one.

Living to fast-forward - that's what I've felt like for the last few weeks. Wanting to fast forward through a busy work week to a restful weekend. Wanting to fast forward through a sick weekend to get back to a "normal" week. Wanting to fast forward to skip the waiting and hoping that no one else will catch the "cooties". I feel like I've been living behind the "8" ball waiting to see what will strike next. Mommy Panic isn't fun. I know this, but yet I've allowed myself to sink back into it, again. When will I learn?? God has EVERYTHING under control!! From all the big stuff to the tiny stuff. When I was fighting the storm of our life, the tiny battle of fighting off a stomach bug seemed trivial. At least in that battle you knew the enemy and ultimately knew there was an end.

Why then, have I let the last few weeks send me into a whirlwind?? I know, I know - we've had a TERRIBLE winter health-wise. In my pediatrician's words, "It's a really high viral load this winter and you seem to be in the center of it!" It's only natural to not enjoy sick times, times when every schedule falls by the wayside, laundry piles to the sky, Girl Scout cookies go undelivered, and holding back the onset of chaos is about all you can manage in a week. It has been rough! But it is during these rough times that I wish I could rest and rely on what I know to be true - God is faithful. I say this, I reference this to others, but my actions aren't proving me out these days. Panic is confusion - the Lord is not the author of confusion (Please excuse me if I'm preaching to only myself right now!)

What's even more eye opening is that my confusion isn't just sickness related. Again, maybe this post is just for my own benefit, but I find myself in the middle of a whirlwind of confusion in my mind right now. It seems I can't find that "sweet spot" in my spirit - that place where you are confident in your relationship with God, your armory of Devil fighting weapons is full and you are ready to shine your light in a dark world. I love God more than ever - He has provided everything I've ever needed and even a few things I've wanted over the years. It just seems like lately, there have been many detractors to this love. Man can clarify or cloud this love - seems like I've been in the middle of some clouds lately. It's easy to stand back and place blame, but ultimately my relationship and my love of MY God is in MY control. The surrounding circumstances are just that - circumstances. They do not and can not define my relationship with God and the benefits of love, joy and peace that come with it!

Oh Lord I pray for you to help me search through the clouds for your love and focus only on that. All of the other stuff is just that - stuff. You will take care of it all in your time!

In the meantime, I am trying to refocus through the clouds and praying for spring!! I need some natural sun to clean out the cooties, and spiritual SON to clean out everything else!!!

I Will Catch Up, I Will Catch Up!!

This phrase can be applied to every facet of life right now. As we speak, the unfolded laundry demon is lurking and about to swallow me whole! In an effort at procrastination (at which I am a PRO), I am avoiding it!!!

Seriously, work is good, life is good, but I feel like every day is a marathon!!! The girls are alternately taking turns being sick which doesn't help the chaotic pace!!! PLEASE hurry Spring!!! I NEED the winter cooties to disappear!!!

Here's some new stuff going on that I actually had time to snap a picture of :)

EK :) - this is BEFORE we contracted an RSV like virus that has turned into an infection that has her sounding like a descendant of Darth Vader with an accompanying diaper BURN (rash is too mild of a description!)

Abby started violin lessons!

CIRCUS!

BIRTHDAY PARTIES!